Flickers
by Captured.By.Insanity
Summary: Something happened to Bella. Something Horrid. And these numbers she sees why is she the only one to see them. And the cullens... Why arent there any numbers on them? Original pairings. Discontinued. Out of ideas
1. Storm

Disclaimer: Don't own nothing…

**Disclaimer: Don't own nothing…. So sad… sniff, sniff.**

**Ok in this story Bella's mother died and Phil would molest her. She has **_**flickers **_** sometimes… a lot actually of her past those will be in italic with hyphens around it. Example - **_-the rain fell- _**etc.**

**Thanks**

BOOMM!!

There was a storm a thunder one. I was terrified of thunder. Lightning too. Don't know why just always have been. It terrified the life out of me. Currently I was in a cocoon of blankets hidden in my closet shaking up a storm of my own.

Drip.

Another drip of sweat stained my already soaked shirt and top of the blanket near my face.

Flash.

My room was continuously lit up. I could see it through the cracks of my closet door. The lightning lit up my closet every time as well.

_(--)_

I was hiding in behind all of my clothes using them as a shield… not that that would do much if my closet started up on fire, I would probably have more chance of dying.

_-Are your hands cold Bella?-_

My mother. My friend. The only one I ever felt close to and then one day she just died. I mean I knew she was going to die. I saw it. I knew how long she had left at only five years old. I knew when everyone was going to die for that matter.

_-Bella, Bella shh…-_

Tears ran down my face further soaking my shirt.

_-But mommy you're going to die-_

The flickers weren't usually this bad. Just during storms.

I hated the flickers. They were too much of a reminder of what happened to put me here in Forks with Charlie. I knew better than to tell anyone about the flickers and numbers. The numbers that one day just appeared the numbers that counted down somebody's life. I knew better then to talk about them. They weren't normal.

I remember that day well. It was the day everything changed. Mom went out grocery shopping slightly sulking because her father just died. She was also getting some thing for my birthday party in a few days. When she returned home she was smiling so hugely I thought her face would fall off.

FLASHBACK

"_Why are you smiling mommy" I remember asking._

"_Because my dearest Bella. I met a man"_

"_What?" I asked_

"_Maybe one day he'll be your new daddy" she replied._

"_Oh!" I had squealed. Of course at that time I had no idea what was going to happen to me._

END OF FLASHBACK

Phil. The single word alone sent shivers down my spine. At first I tried to put up with it because he mad Renee so happy. She was smiling all the time. She sang so loud in the shower and when Phil spent the night sometimes she would practically make a feast. She never made that much food before.

She baked all the time.

Then one day she just announced.

"Bella, Phil's going to move into this house with us." I tried to smile. I mean I was seven now and I knew it was wrong. My mother didn't seem to understand my sudden interest in black clothing or why I was always wearing longs sleeves and pants in Phoenix but shrugged it off. Like it was a phase.

I knew Phil wouldn't die anytime soon either. I had begun to figure the numbers out. The other day my mother had taken me shopping with her and there was am an with 0.9 above his head. He was walking and reading a newspaper at the same time stepped onto the road and got hit by a vehicle. Died instantly.

_-Our little secret-_

BOOM!!

The thunder just continued on lightning flashing soon after. I was beginning to fall asleep. Then thunder woke me up again. It had to be at least four in the morning. I new when I moved here with Charlie it would rain a lot and I knew I would hate it but unfortunately I had no choice.

I heard some shuffling from the hallway. My door open.

"Bells." Someone said sleepily.

I didn't recognize the voice at first but then I realized it was Charlie. What was Charlie doing in here?

"Yea" I murmured. He seemed to know where I would be. He walked over to the closet and opened the door at the same time the thunder crashed and a tree brushed against the window. It creeped me out and I let out a shriek and crushed myself back farther.

_-Oh Bella-_

_-Do you want some ice cream-_

_-Touch it-_

I cried out and more tears started to fall down my face.

"Bella, What's wrong?" Charlie asked

I just shook my head not able to answer

_-You cant resist me-_

I looked up at Charlie reassuringly and checked his numbers. Right above his head. Hanging there off of invisible threads. Moving as he moved. He still had quite a few years. I smiled. I wonder how long I had left. I wonder if anyone else could see the numbers.

"Bells, lets get you back in bed, and your probably going to want to change. From the looks of it your clothes are soaked." Charlie said. He was so nice. I really did like Charlie. If only Renee had stayed here with him maybe my life would have turned out different. I had come here during the summers and I loved it. It got me away from Phil.

But it wasn't a long enough time. I stopped coming at 15 because Phil forbid it. He made me lie to Renee about it. And I have never been a very good liar so it was difficult but I finally made her keep me here.

I was afraid to sleep. I was afraid to be alone. And then because of that single night I became afraid of many more things.

Silence. Thunder. Lightning. Fire. Knives. And bugs. The things he did with those bugs. The horrors that were stuck in mind from a single night.

Nobody realizes that only a few hours can change your entire life. Your entire personality. Your entire being.

Until it happens to them.

**A/N ok I need to know what you think of it because if no body likes it I have no purpose in continuing it so… if you like it review it. Otherwise I have no reason to continue. And if its criticism then review as well please.**


	2. School?

Disclaimer: I Don't own nothing unfortunately

**Disclaimer: I Don't own nothing unfortunately. **

**Thanks for reviewing everybody. I really do appreciate it.**

**Looking for a beta reader person.**

**Italic and Underlined means what she's thinking ex. **_Edward. _ **Hehe.**

Charlie had eventually left with me still curled up in the closet. He had given up all attempts to get me to crawl into bed.

_-good girl Isabella. Just like that-_

I quietly whimpered.

_-yes Isabella yes-_

I clutched my head trying to make them stop. Trying to stop the impossible trying to make the impossible possible.

_-SLAP!-_

I saw the cracks of the closet door brighten slightly, no sun in Forks, must be about six.

I used my foot to push open the closet door, slowly very slowly.

I crawled to the outside then stood up. I turned around to find clothes to where to school today.

Knock Knock!

Charlie opened my door.

"Bells, are you going to school today. You haven't been in a couple weeks but you need to go back."

"Yea" I whispered.

_-'Smells good Renee' he said then winked at me-_

I shuddered. They were still coming on strong. After-effects of the storm.

I picked out a plain black tank top and put a nightmare before Christmas sweater on to cover up where I had scratched my wrist last night. That along with other scars of cuts I had made, were there. On both wrists, when I got nervous I scratched my wrist so hard I drew blood and I did it constantly for about ten minutes. It relieved me of my nervousness. All of my long sleeved shirts were dirty.

I had a pair of skinny jeans, a pair of flat boots and a hat.

I may be some weird kid with emo like habits but I had a great fashion sense. **(pic of outfit on profile except tank top.)**

i went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I brushed my hair and put on some black eyeliner.

I went down the stairs tripping on the last one, my face meeting the floor.

_Ouch_

I picked myself up off the floor and walked into the kitchen grabbing a package of pop tarts and a Monster energy drink. I grabbed my rain coat and opened the door. It was still raining.

A downside. When it rains or after a rainstorm, like the night before, I shake. I quickly shrugged on my coat and ran to my truck. A raindrop hit my face and I shrieked. I opened the door hastily and got in slamming the door shut. I turned the truck on and swiftly turned the heater on all the way up.

_Breathe Bella Breathe. _ I repeated to myself encouragingly.

I put the truck in gear and back out of the drive way pulling onto our street and headed off to Forks High. Forks High was nothing like in Phoenix. In Phoenix there was a 8 foot tall fence with the things on the top to keep you from climbing over them, surrounding the school grounds. There was also security at the doors and going just around anywhere. There were cameras everywhere as well. In Forks High I had to wonder if there were locks on the classroom doors.

I drove up to the parking lot. There was all old cars here. The newest car here is a 2000 Toyo… hold up a second. There was a Volvo here. Somebody won the lottery… ha-ha or a rich kid just moved here. I giggled at the second thought. No rich kid or family would move to Forks. Some kid just got lucky. The things that happened in two weeks time.

I walked into my first class. It droned on and on. The minutes ticked and turned to an hour. The bell rang. Next class.

My morning went like this. Class. Ignore teacher. See unwanted numbers. Doodle in notebook. Bella rings. Locker. Class. Ignore teacher. Add up numbers, whose gonna die first. Doodle in notebook. Bell rings. Locker. Class… you get the idea of it.

LUNCH

I walked into the cafeteria for the first time in months. Usually I didn't like coming in here. There were too many people. Too many numbers. They all hung there. Unseen by everyone else eye. But today I had forgotten to pack a lunch.

I walked through the lunch line grabbing the food I wanted. Apple, Sandwich, orange juice. I paid the lunch lady and took notice of here numbers. Four days left. Its sad. I kind of liked her. I made notice of her name, Jean, and gave her a warm smile. She smiled back. I walked off. I was moving towards my typical table when I noticed, there were people there.

Gorgeous people. Inhumanly beautiful people. Five of them. There trays of untouched food pushed towards the center of the table and all of them looking different directions. They looked at me as I stopped. Five pairs of honey golden eyes on me.

"Sorry." I mumbled.

"Is this your table?" the short pixie looking one asked.

"Usually. But I can find somewhere else." I looked up. Something unexpected greeted me. There were no numbers above there heads! How was that possible? I had never encountered this before and I had lived in Phoenix. I just stood there and gaped.

I swear my mouth was hanging open as well.

"Are you okay?" the bronze haired God, yes he was a god I could have sworn, asked me.

"Fine" I replied and walked to the table beside them that was completely empty and sat down with my back to them. As I took a bite of my apple I contemplated what this meant.

**Edwards POV**

Just over a week ago we arrived in Forks. Carlisle immediately got a job. And guess what. We got signed up for school. High school all over again! The joy. Yup. So fun.

Just recently there was a storm. A great thunder storm. So my family and I went to play baseball. It was Alice, Carlisle and me against Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie. Esme was the umpire. Carlisle, Alice and I won. 4-3.

Later we went home and I listened to music.

The next week was like any other. That is until I smelt a glorious scent. Venom watered my mouth. I looked around the cafeteria trying to match the scent with the person. I hadn't smelt them before. Were they new here?

I gave up when I couldn't place the scent. Looking off again I listened to some thoughts.

_Look there's Bella. The freak. But she's got a great fashion sense…_

_Hottie if she wasn't a freak…_

_I cant believe Richard would…_

_How silly of me to forget my lunch…_

_We have a math quiz next period and I didn't study…._

Okay I was bored now. Then I heard something I had never heard before. Footsteps, but they were approaching us. What the… nobody came near us.

"Sorry" a girl mumbled. My whole family looked at her.

_Nobody comes near us…_

_She smells so good!_

_Eww… what does a filthy human like her want?_

_Her fashion sense is pretty good…_

"Is this your table?" Alice asked her.

"Usually. But I can find somewhere else." The girl mumbled. The girl looked up at us.

I gasped silently. She was gorgeous. Her brown hair was wavy and her skin was pale. Her big brown eyes staring at us in aw. She was looking at us all. Her mouth was agape.

"Are you okay?" I asked. Then went to read her mind to figure out what was wrong. But it was blank. Like she was thinking absolutely nothing. I kept trying. I opened up to everything and I found everyone's thoughts but hers. Why was that.

"Fine" she replied. Then she walked to the table beside us and sat down with her back to us. For the rest of the lunch period. I sat thinking about the girl. And her mouthwatering scent. And when I would see her again. Why I couldn't read her mind. And last of all. Did I have the control to see her again?

**A/N Okay what do u guys think. REVIEW! Please and let me know. **

**LOOKING FOR A BETA READER!**


	3. Meet 'Cullen' No Numbers?

A/N BETA READER

**A/N BETA READER?!**

**Disclaimer. I don't own nothing blah, blah, blah. **

BPOV

After lunch I looked at my schedule. Biology. I headed to the building and stepped in removing my jacket like everyone else. I hung it up and walked up to the front of the class where the teacher sat behind his desk.

"I need you to sign this." He looked up at me.

"New kid?" he asked.

"Bella Swan" I replied, keeping my head down.

"Oh" he muttered and took the sheet from my hands. He signed it and spun 180°. He stood up and went the shelf on the side of the classroom and grabbed me a textbook. He came back and wrote the number down and handed me the text book. When I turned around everyone had arrived and the only empty seat was beside….. Yup, the bronze haired guy from lunch. One of five with no numbers. I made my way back towards him and tripped over somebody's bag. Of course I toppled over. I stood straight back up my face tomato red.

I was so embarrassed. I kept walking to the table. I sat down and immediately heard the seat beside me shift over. Was there some unknown reason for hate here?

I let my hair drape down in-between us as a curtain. I secretly sniffed my hair. Strawberries. The class continued and at one point I caught his eye and he stared at me. His eyes pitch black.

"Mr. Cullen?" the teacher asked. I hadn't even heard the question.

"The Krebs Cycle" he answered. The teacher seemed to approve this answer and I found out his name. Well last name anyway. Cullen.

After class 'Cullen' ran out of class like a bat out of hell. **(hehe)** and a baby faced looking boy came up to our table.

"Did you stab Cullen with a pencil or something. I've never seen him act like that before?"

I shook my head 'no' before putting my jacket back on. And walking out of the room

_Later on afterschool._

I got to my truck and stepped in. I was angry. Mike, the baby faced boy had asked me out twice and a greasy haired, acne filled face; boy named Erik had been overly helpful. In gym I had not had to participate, for which I was thankful for, and just watched. That was good.

I quickly backed out of the parking space I was in and almost ran into a Toyota behind me.

When I got home I dropped my bag by the stairs and went into the kitchen. Tonight I would make supper for Charlie again; I hadn't in a couple days. There was still some leftover pizza. I found the ingredients for spaghetti. When I had the water boiling I took my bag up to my room and sat down on my bed.

Homework. Gah. I got up and opened up my homework.

I heard the door opening.

"Bells! Are you making something?"

Crap. The Food!

I ran down the stairs and ran into the kitchen. The water was boiling over and there was water all over the floor.

"Damn" I muttered. I quickly turned off the burner and ran to find a mop.

"I'll call for pizza" Charlie said.

"OK" I shouted back. I came back to the kitchen with a mop in hand and began the floor clean up. As I was cleaning I slipped and I must have hit my head on something hard because I blacked out.

CHARLIES POV

I came home to see a pot over boiling in the kitchen.

"Bells! Are you making something?"

I heard her race down the stairs and into the kitchen while I went into the living room to watch TV.

"Damn" I heard her mutter.

"I'll call for pizza" I said.

"OK" she yelled back. After a couple minutes I heard a crash.

"Bella?!" I called. "Bella are you all right!?" When no one replied I quickly went into the kitchen.

Bella was laying on her back on the floor with blood gushing from her head and arm.

I raced to the phone and called 911, gave them the info they needed and hung up.

They came and took her away.

EDWARDSPOV

**(A/N okay guys I have no idea what they would say to the doctor and so on so um… just go with it please) **

"Dr .Cullen we have an victim coming in the emergency doors. Female, 17 years old, Chief Swans daughter. Fell in the kitchen and has head and arm trauma." Carlisle looked at me for a second.

_Don't go anywhere Edward. I'll be back in a bit. You can finish explaining to me then._

I nodded and Carlisle left trailing the person who came for him.

CARLISLE POV

I followed the nurse down the hallway and to the emergency doors. They wheeled in a brunette haired girl. Her face amazingly enough was twisted into pain. We took her into an room and inspected it. For now it seemed she just had cut her head open and it was just bleeding. But her arm had glass in it. The back of her arm.

"Just her arm I believe is what we need to look at. And stitches to the head as well"

_Edward. I have to perform stitches and remove some glass. I might be about an hour._

I sent a message to Edward. Hoping he would be there when I got back.

Isabella Swan. That was her name. Right now she was still unconscious.

So when I was finished I made my way back to Edward. Thankfully he was still there.

EDWARDS POV

Carlisle walked into the office. While he was gone I had thought about the girl. The one with the beautiful scent. She was like an angel walking on earth. Alice kept thinking about her outfit and how it good it was and how cool she looked.

Carlisle came back in and he had the scent on her. The wonderful scent.

"Carlisle why do u smell like her?" I asked.

"Like who?" he replied.

"Like Isabella Swan?" I asked.

"She just came in. She was the one who fell in the kitchen and split her head and got glass in her arm" he replied. "Now why had you come here to talk?" he questioned.

"I came to talk about Isabella." I replied.

"What about her?" he asked.

"I think she is my sin…"

Carlisle's pager went off.

"Sorry Edward."

He ran off. I think he had reached her room because it kind of looked like her on the bed.

CARLISLE POV

_Edward it was a code blue. Her heart stopped._

**A/N okay people how was it??**

**By the way. There is possibility of me not updating as quick cuz school is started so sorry.**

**:)**

**Please review/**


	4. Past

Disclaimer: I don't own anything

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. All Stephanie Meyer's**

**What is underlined is like a flashback thing.**

EDWARD POV

Once I heard Carlisle tell me those words i swear had my heart been beating it no longer would be. But I don't know why. She was my singer. Not my lover. But how come I reacted so strongly to her code blue?

I went back to Carlisle thoughts.

_Edward if you are listening her heart started back up but she hasn't woken up. Its like she is asleep. And she keeps screaming every few minutes._

So that's what that noise was. I thought I had heard something. Why was Bella screaming? Why couldn't I read her mind?

Bella, what happened to you?

BELLAS POV

After I blacked out in the kitchen. i heard some voices. Where were they coming from. Then in front of me like I was standing and watching my childhood came the picture of

All of us eating dinner, my mom, me and _Phil_. I hated him with such a passion.

_-Come on Bella-_

_-Give it your all-_

_-Bella, Bella, Your mothers gone. Its playtime-_

He had winked at me.

"I have to run out later Phil, honey. I have my Book Club meeting." **(this might not fit her personality but just go with it) **

"Okay Renee" he replied.

When she left he came over to me.

"Bella sweetie. Go change into pajamas" he said.

"Its only six though" I had replied. Phil had been living with us for about 5 months. They had dated since I was around five. Phil made her so happy. 

"Because we are going to have a party." He told me. 

I thought he had meant watching movies and stuff.

When I came down in my typical pajamas- just a long t-shirt that reached my knees- Phil called me into the living room. 

"Bella!" he called. I walked into the living room.

"I set up a sleeping bag and made some popcorn." He said. Mom's club usually lasted till around 10 they all gossiped and talked about four different books then talked and debated on a knew book or two to read. I know because once I thought maybe I would go with her and she had agreed.

He put in my favorite movie. The Cinderella Story. 

When we were at the part with Sam and Chad dancing and just about to kiss. Phil picked me up and put me in his lap then whispered in my ear. 

"Bella do you know how to do that?"

  
"No" I whispered back. Unsure why Phil had asked me a question like that.

"Do you want to learn?" he asked. I thought it over.

"I'm not old enough." I told him firmly. Or what I thought was firmly anyway.

"Yes you are"

I stood there and watched my childhood replay.

"DON'T DO IT!" I screamed at my younger self.

"Are you sure?" I asked Phil.

"Of course." He replied. He turned me around in his lap. He leaned his head down and kissed my lips, just pecks at first. But then stopped and told me that when his lips touched mine I needed to open my mouth. So I did and he kissed me softly at first but then very violently. 

"Good girl Isabella just like that" he moaned.

I had to turn away from myself. Stop Bella stop.

CARLISLES POV

I rushed to Isabella's room and got the deliberator which was already for use. We used the first charge and her heart started up but she didn't wake up. She looked to be asleep. And her breathing was fast. Like she was having a nightmare.

What spooked me right out was about a minute after her heart started back up she sat straight up like she was awake but her eyes were closed and screamed. It was loud, especially for me. Then she fell back down on her bed. We, as in the other nurses and I all stood there stunned. A couple minutes later she sat up, turned to the side and stood up. A few wires fell off her and we all rushed to her side telling her to lie back down. She was unresponsive. She was sleepwalking, in a sense. Then she stopped and we tried to move her back. But she wouldn't go.

"Isabella go to bed now" I told her calmly as if she were awake. It works for some people when they are sleepwalking. She let out another scream.

A louder scream then the last one. And then she fell onto the floor and grabbed her head and assumed a fatal position. When anyone tried to go near her she started screaming more and hitting them. But she was still asleep. Or her eyes were closed anyway.

"Isabella, Isabella its okay" I told her. As I slowly moved towards her to try and calm her. She stopped moving and her eyes opened.

"Who are you?" she asked.

"I'm your doctor. I'm Dr. Cullen."

She looked above my head like there was something there. She tilted her head from once side to the other.

"No numbers again." She whispered. I don't think she noticed that I heard her. I don't understand though. What numbers?

BELLAS POV

"Isabella, Isabella its okay" I heard. Who was talking to me. I looked around me and saw no one. Mind you I was still watching my past. I felt a jerking and my past was gone and was looking into beautiful topaz eyes.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"I'm your doctor. I'm Dr. Cullen." He replied. I looked above his head. The last Cullen I had met had no numbers. Did this one have any?

"No numbers again." I whispered. I tilted my head from the left to the right and back to the left thinking maybe this time I just couldn't see because of the light.

"Lets get you back into bed" Dr. Cullen said.

I must have looked at him questioningly because he looked down. When I followed to where his eyes led I noticed I was on the floor.

"Why am I on the floor?" I asked.

"I think you were dreaming. You got out of bed and started to walk around. Its okay now though" he replied. I nodded and stood up.

CARLISLES POV

She stood up and then I smelt blood. I quickly checked her over and noticed her IV needle was sticking in a weird direction in her skin and that a couple of stitches had opened up.

"Isabella…"

"Its Bella" I cut in.

"Ok, Bella. We are going to need to re stitch a couple of cuts as you seem to have ripped them, and we need to fix your IV needle." I looked down to see my needle went in my arm and then out about 3 cm away and then back in. That wasn't normal.

I nodded.

Dr. Cullen dismissed all the nurses then looked at me.

"Bella what did you mean 'No Numbers'?"

**A/N okay peoples thank you for reading. Please review/**

**And thanks to my Beta Cudgeled.**


	5. Hospitals and Pasts

Disclaimer: I don't own anything

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. All Stephanie Meyer's**

**And thanks to my Beta - Cudgeled.**

BELLA'S POV

"Bella what did you mean 'No Numbers?'" Carlisle asked.

WHAT?! He heard me? _Think of a lie, Bella, think of a lie._

"Uh… well. You see…"

"Is there something special that you would like to say?" Carlisle asked. If only he knew. While I was here I didn't want to be admitted to the psych ward.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I settled on.

"Are you sure, Bella?" he asked.

"Positive. I don't know what you're talking about."

I don't think he believed me, but he stopped pushing.

"Okay, so Bella, I think we should give you a MRI and make sure you don't have a concussion after all this."

I nodded in response. With my luck, I probably have one.

He took me to a room where I had to lay down on a bed and have my head put into an MRI machine.

CARLISLE'S POV

When the MRI came through to the comp **(no idea how it works to have an MRI)**, with me was a neuron surgeon and 2 nurses. When her MRI came up on screen, we all stared.

"I've never seen anything like that…" Dr. Deardon stated.

"It's… It's amazing," said a nurse.

Bella's brain was shaped and connected differently, like she had extra… extra everything in her brain. Instead of the human 4 of brain being used, she had to use at least 45 of her brain **(Just go with it. She has a different type of brain ok…). **When she came out and I had her back in her room, I asked her,

"Bella, has anything abnormal ever happened to you?"

"Wha… What do you mean?" she stuttered.

"Any features. Mind things. Anything?"

"Uh… no? Why?" she asked.

BELLA'S POV

"Because… because instead of the normal 4 of the human brain used, you use about 45."

_-Come on Bella-_

_-You can do better than that-_

_-Push, Bella, Push-_

I screamed and clutched my head. I thought maybe because I hadn't had them in a while they were gone, but I thought wrong. They still came. I still had flickers.

CARLISLE'S POV

Bella fell to the floor clutching her head. Maybe these were some side effects of having such a high usage of a brain. My mind was reeling with ideas, theories and conclusions, to what was happening.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I asked, concerned.

"They're… they're back!" she answered, slightly out of breath. I picked her up off the floor and put her gently on the bed.

_Edward, come here. I need help!_

Bella went back to clutching her head. Her breathing was becoming quicker and her breath becoming shorter and louder. What was wrong with her?

BELLA'S POV

He kept kissing me and moaning.

  
After that, every time my mother left the house Phil would kiss me. Then one day my mother left and I knew he was going to kiss me. I was in my room when Phil came in. 

"Bella, Your mother is gone now on a business trip. It's playtime.," he told me. He came and sat down beside me on the bed.

"Bella, now that I have taught you how to kiss, we are going to move it to the next level," he said. But what does he mean exactly by next level? 

He leaned in and kissed me. For some reason, this kiss was more passionate then he had ever before kissed me. But I don't know why. His hand started to roam my chest like he was looking for some boobs. I didn't have any yet.

"Okay, Bella. My hand is going to roam your body, and I want yours to do the same." I nodded, too afraid to speak. He started to kiss me more, and then his hand trailed down to my lower area. I put my hand on his chest and started to move it in circles. He started to moan really loudly. I didn't know how to stop him. This wasn't feeling right. I had walked in on Phil and Mom in bed one time and I caught them…

_Wake up, _I heard from somewhere.

_It's all okay. Just wake up._

CARLISLE'S POV

Then she just went unconscious like she had earlier before her MRI. What was wrong? This time she was more violent. I had to get a nurse to retrieve some soft straps to hold her down, because she was pulling her hair out and scratching up her skin. Once we had her in the bed strapped down, she started screaming louder and louder.

Soon Edward appeared beside me.

"What do you need?"

_Read her mind and tell me why she's in such a horrible state. What's triggering these episodes?_

He nodded then looked at Bella. Then he stopped. Then got an intense look on his face and stared really hard at her. His face crumpled up, and he stopped staring at her. He looked at me and shook his head.

Could he not read her mind? Why not? This had never happened before.

Edward flicked his head to the door and I shook mine.

"Nurse, could you please excuse us?" I asked smiling. She nodded dreamily and I caught Edward's look of disgust.

EDWARD'S POV

After Carlisle asked the nurse to leave, he smiled and she had started thinking about things he could do to her with that mouth. I looked at her with disgust, but she was too busy looking at Carlisle. Once she had closed the door behind her, I spoke.

"Carlisle, I can't read her mind. It's blank, like she's not even there."

"This hasn't ever happened before. I wonder why now…" He replied.

"If I recall correctly, I couldn't read her mind at school when I met her there, either."

Of course I recalled it. I couldn't ever forget an angel like her. She screamed. She was so beautiful. Strapped down to the bed like that hurt. It made her look so helpless, especially when she screamed. In between her screams she whimpered. It hurt to watch Bella struggle against her binds. There was hair on the floor, and I hadn't been breathing. When I finally did, I realized that there was an amazing scent. Like freesias.

Blood. It was blood. And it was coming from Bella.

She screamed the loudest scream yet.

It hurt to watch this any longer, so I walked over beside her bed. Carlisle looked at me with the 'Careful' eye. I shook her shoulders gently.

"Wake up," I whispered softly into her ear.

"Its okay… just wake up…"

Her eyes popped open with surprise. She yelped in surprise, then collapsed on the bed with exhaustion.

"Did you wake me?" she asked.

"Yes," I replied.

"Then I thank you. I couldn't stand watching my past any longer." then she stopped herself, and her head hung.

BELLA'S POV

"Then I thank you. I couldn't stand watching my past any longer."

_Hold up. Don't say any more_, I told myself.

I'd already said too much, and it was too late to take it back.

I let my head hang.

"Why am I strapped down?" I asked.

"You were attacking yourself. I had to stop you from doing so." Dr. Cullen replied

"Bella, what in your past so bad that it causes you to physically attack yourself?" the boy asked.

_Crap._ Was all I could think.

**A/N: Okay, thank you, everyone, for reading. Please review. **

**And thank you to my Beta, ****cudgeled.**


	6. What actually happened

A/N okay sorry it took a little longer I wasn't sure what to have to happen, Authors block or whatever

**A/N okay sorry it took a little longer I wasn't sure what to have to happen, Authors block or whatever. So here it is. Thank you everyone especially my Beta Cudgeled. Disclaimer: I don't own anything.**

**Thank you to Ninjanoni as well for the wonderful idea of this story.**

BELLA'S POV

_Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. I can't think up this big of a lie this quickly._

"It's not my past as in my life past. Just nightmares I have about things. I re-dream nightmares." God. Could I get anymore stupider? Of course they would go for that. But then again that wasn't all a lie. Phil _was_ a nightmare of the past.They kept on looking at me, their eyes piercing my skin. I started to sweat.

"Edward, go home. I'll meet you there later."

CARLISLE'S POV

I watched as Bella started to sweat under our gazes. Her eyes told me she was thinking hard.

"Edward, go home. I'll meet you there later." I said.

_She's under a lot of stress right now with the both of us looking at her and being caught in such a silly lie. We can be pretty intimidating, _I told Edward through my mind.

He nodded, and then left. I waited a couple of minutes, then proceeded to talk to Bella.

"Bella, what happened to you?"

Bella just stared at her blanket for a while. She looked up at me and opened her mouth like she was about to say something, but quickly snapped it shut.

"N-nothing," she stuttered.

"Bella, we both know that's not true," I told her. I knew somehow that something bad had happened to her in the past before she came to Forks. It might even have been the reason for her to come to Forks.

"When I was five, my mother came home from the grocery store and was extremely happy. I didn't know why," she started off, "She told me she met a man, and she smiled so happily. I hadn't seen her smile in so long. Her father had just died…" She looked off in space. "She became so happy. She was singing in and out of the shower again. She would spoil him, too. Make practically a feast when he came for supper. But Phil started to act weird around me. I shrugged it off. Then my mother started to ask him to watch me instead of sending me to Daycare. He worked at home anyway. At first it was nothing, but about 5 months after he started to live with us, he asked me to go get pajamas on around six. I was confused, but since he had told me that we were going to have a party, I obeyed. When I came back, he had set out my sleeping bag and made some popcorn. He also put in my favorite movie, A Cinderella Story. When the two main characters kissed, he asked if I knew how to do that. Obviously I said no, and he said I needed to learn. So he taught me. It wasn't long until he had progressed onto body movements, touching each other, and then eventually the actual sex."

She stopped for a few seconds, teary eyed, but not actually crying.

"All this happened over the course of about 5 years. I wished for Phil's death so many times." She chuckled there, though I had no idea why. I didn't find anything funny in Bella's words. "Then one night, it was stormy. There was lightning and thunder going on in Phoenix, which just about never happens. So we were all very surprised. That same night I was 12, and finally told my mother what had been happening the last 5 years. She cried and confronted Phil. Naturally, he told her it was a lie. They started fighting, violently. They were in the kitchen. Phil took out a butcher's knife and stabbed her. I was in the kitchen with them both when this happened. He just kept going, probably after she was dead too. My eyes were too watery to see out of when he was killing her. When he stood up, I thought he was going to kill me too. But instead, he grabbed my arm and dropped the knife. He picked me up and carried me out to his car, even after I kept thrashing in his arms. He knocked me out by hit me on the head with a rock, which I still have a dent in my head from."

She motioned for me to go over to her. She put one hand on the back of her head, and grabbed my hand with her other, placing it on the dent. I could feel it, especially with my heightened senses.

"I woke up a little later, just as we were driving away. I could see flames taking away my home, my mother dead inside, Phil driving me away. While I was out, he had tied my hands and feet up with rope. When he stopped, we were at a warehouse just outside of Phoenix. He picked me up, carried me into the warehouse, and then threw me in a room that was probably a closet. He kept me there for a while, tied up, and fed me once a day. Some bread, and sometimes if I was lucky, I got milk instead of water to go with it."

I had sat down on the edge of her bed by now, to keep up the human facade. "He kept me in there for about a year, I suppose. He had eventually taken off the ropes, but one day he gave me a glass cup instead of a plastic one. I got the idea to smash the cup and then the next time he came in I would stab him with it, and hopefully get away. He came in eventually, and when he did, I found out what had taken him so long. He had been collecting bugs. Wasps, which I am allergic to, as well as bees. He had them both. He had centipedes and spiders. He had ladybugs and moths. He had dragonflies. He had beetles. He had a container for each bug, and a huge container, at that. **((Container size on profile))** One of each bug. Luckily, he had put down the containers before he opened the door. When he opened the door, I charged at him and stabbed him with the glass. Phil was so stunned that I was able to run. I was weak, but Phil was too. Running was never a strong point of Phil's. He had tried out for professional baseball once, but didn't make it. He was too slow. Thankfully. I got away and hid in the forest. I then made my way back into Phoenix, and to a police station. There I told them everything, pretty much this same story. They drove me to the warehouse so they could collect evidence. They got their evidence, but Phil had disappeared by the time they got there. They caught him about 3 months later, and my relatives were contacted. Charlie, my real father, was the first one to say that he would take me. So I was shipped off with no belongings, no possessions, to Charlie. I must say though that when I first told the police who I was they didn't believe me because I had been declared dead from the fire. But they were finally convinced, and that's partly why Phil got away to start with. It took about 1½ hours to convince the police that I was me, and that it was all happening."

She took a deep breath and waited for my response.

BELLA'S POV

When I finally finished my story, which took a while might I say, Carlisle just gaped at me. He stood up. To leave?

"That's quite a story. I'm amazed that anyone could handle that."

"Please don't say anything." I told him.

He nodded.

"Can I ask you something, though?"

"Go ahead," I answered.

"I have two questions, actually. How are you not crying right now, and why did you chuckle when you said you wished for his death a lot?"

Crap.

Again.

**A/N okay people please update. Thank you again to my beta Cudgeled and to Ninjanoni.**


	7. Lilium

A/N okay guys I am so sorry for not updating this story sooner

**A/N okay guys I am so sorry for not updating this story sooner! My computer was screwed cuz a piece of the motherboard fell off and made it so the computer was fried. So I had to wait until my beta sent back chapter 6 and then because I was at the library I figured out hey maybe I could put chapter 6 on my memory stick and type the chapter up on my crap computer in my room that doesn't work very well. So that is what I am doing right now. **

**Thank you to Cudgeled for beta-ing my story!**

BELLA'S POV

Crap.

Again.

Why _wasn't_ I crying?

I had to think that over for a second.

While answering that, I had to try and avoid the second question. That was the only way to actually ever get out of a hospital. If I told them the truth, and they actually believed me, I would be shipped off to some laboratory to be studied for the rest of my life. I was _not_ about to get myself into a situation like that.

"I guess finally telling somebody what I've had bottled up for so long helped, and also, I hate Phil so much that he is not worth crying over."

Dr. Cullen nodded and said,

"And chuckling about Phil dying?"

CRAP.

_Just drop it Doctor.._. I sneered in my mind. How do I get out of _this_ one?

"Well… there was a stray thought running through my head at the time and I was laughing at it…" I said hurriedly.

Well, _that_ had to be the worst lie in the book!

He looked at me, and I could tell he didn't believe me in the slightest.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" I asked, hoping to drag the subject away from its current topic.

Dr. Cullen sighed, then nodded. I had to keep my IV in, so he helped me get stable when I stood up. Then I had to wheel the stupid thing with me. I stepped out of the door, happy to be out of the room. I guess I wasn't paying much attention to my surroundings, because suddenly I heard yelp.

"Hey! Watch it!"

It was a child's voice. I looked down and saw a cute little girl. I guess I had been around Dr. Cullen so much that I forgot what the numbers looked like. I jumped and then stood there stunned by the sudden sight of the numbers. Dr. Cullen steadied me and said,

"Bella, are you okay?"

I nodded weakly. I focused on the numbers again and realized how little time the girl had left. The nurse with the girl cleared her throat.

"Sorry." I apologized to them both.

Then I spoke again.

"What's wrong with you?" I blurted out before I could think.

Dr. Cullen, the nurse, and the little girl looked stunned for a moment, then the girl mumbled, "I'm sick"

I felt my eyes start to get teary and my vision began to get blurred.

"Me too." I told the girl.

"What's your name?" she asked me.

I was a little surprised.

"Bella," I told her, "and you?"

"Lily," she told me.

"Well, Lily, it's very nice to meet you. How old are you?" I asked, shooting another question.

She held up her fingers.

"8," she said.

I nodded.

My eyes were getting blurrier as I talked to Lily. She was 8, and she was sick. She was so cute too! She had long, wavy, strawberry blonde hair. Her eyes were a bright blue and she was small and delicate-looking. She had a frail-looking face and her arms were probably half the size of my wrist. I looked at her numbers again, and let out a single sob.

"Whats wrong?" she asked.

I just shook my head, and the nurse must have said something, because they both started to walk again. Lily stopped and waved, then once she saw me wave in return, she and the nurse walked along. Lily's head bobbed as she walked, the cursed numbers bobbing in sync.

Why her? She was so young, and she had barely a day left.

That's when I hit my limit. I collapsed on the floor, and Dr. Cullen asked me the stupidest question.

"Bella, are you alright?"

"Why the hell would I be alright?! Wh-What's wrong with her?!" I said, stuttering near the end.

"Heart disease." He stated.

"But she's so young! Why does she have so little time left?" I asked.

I'm pretty sure I was asking impossible questions.

Dr. Cullen looked at me funny.

"She's not necessarily going to die. Her operation is today. It's got an 87 success rate."

He and his stupid doctor facts. She wasn't going to live through the operation!

"And what if she's in the 13 unsuccessful rate?" I questioned.

"She won't be," He told me.

I laughed.

"That's what you think…" I murmured.

At least I thought I did.

"What do you mean, 'That's what you think?'" Dr. Cullen asked.

His brow furrowed. I looked above him, at his invisible numbers. Why didn't any of the Cullen's have numbers? What was so special about them that they didn't get numbers?

"Nothing. I didn't mean anything. Forget I ever said anything." I said.

Then I stood up and went back to my room. I lay down on my bed.

"Bella, I have to go attend to a couple more patients. When I come back I have a couple more things to ask and explain." Dr. Cullen told me.

I _think_ I nodded. I closed my eyes. I knew he'd left once I heard the door close with a final click. I sighed.

CARLISLE'S POV

Bella was so confusing! Whenever I seemed to bring up some unwanted subject, Bella would try to change it! I was so curious as to why she was so sad towards Lily. The operation she was going to get had such a high success rate! I mean there were higher success rate operations known, but not for this disease. I was absolutely positive that Lily could make it. Lily was such a cute little girl too! Her family would be devastated.

I pushed Lily out of my thoughts.

Bella.

She had such a horrible past. I wondered how men could be so cruel! Rosalie went through a similar event, but not half as bad. I felt for Bella, but I couldn't help wonder what she was hiding.

BELLA'S POV

Lily! How sad.

_You are such a cute little girl. I wish you weren't dying…. _

Why was I cursed with this unknown power to see others' lifetime left? Why was I so different from everybody else? If I could see others' time of death, why couldn't I save them? I mean, I could help them evade it for about a day, but that was all.

My eyes watered and I started to sob. My body wracked with the sobs. I was crying for about 15 minutes. When I looked up, my eyes red and puffy, I screamed.

I screamed loud.

When I was finally out of breath, I stopped.

In front of me, something so foreign and frightening, I was about to start screaming again when the words, "Stop Screaming!" rang through the air. I was stunned, Did that crea-

"Do not continue that sentence either."

My mouth gaped.

**(I almost stopped there. I was so close to doing so but then I thought I owed it to all of you for not updating sooner. Its like 1280 words right now. My goal for you guys is around 2000)**

CARLISLE'S POV

I left Bella to check on my other patients. I was gone for about 15 minutes when I heard a bloodcurdling scream that didn't stop. It took me a second to realize that I knew that voice.

It was Bella's.

_EDWARD SOMETHING IS WRONG! COME NOW, _I screamed in my mind.

Why was she screaming?

Then, just as suddenly as it started, it stopped.

_It's coming from Bella's room, _I told him.

He should be here by now! I knew, because I was pretty sure he never really left the hospital. He just didn't listen.

EDWARD'S POV

_EDWARD SOMETHING IS WRONG! COME BACK NOW,_ Carlisle screamed in his mind.

For the past couple hours I had been with all the kids that were in the hospital. I played the piano for them and I told them stories.

I started to run a little faster than a human could, but not so fast that I would be a blur.

_It's coming from Bella's room!_

I sped up a little bit.

_Why?_ I wondered.

Why was I so worried about Bella? I mean she is an extraordinary human, but why did I care?

I rushed into Bella's room to see her curled up in a corner. She kept repeating something over and over.

"Your not real! You're not real!"

I walked over to her, trying to make my footsteps slightly louder than normal so she would know coming.

"Bella…" I whispered.

She screamed hoarsely, her voice worn out from earlier. Her head whipped up and she started to yell again.

"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE! YOU'RE NOT REAL!"

That stunned me. Had she figured out our secret? I noticed that her eyes were clenched shut and she was breathing heavily.

"Bella, it's just me, Edward…" I said soothingly. Times like this would be nice if Jasper were around.

She opened her eyes a little bit, then all the way. She threw her arms around my neck and started to sob into my chest.

BELLA'S POV

I was sobbing into someone's chest when it spoke again.

"How sweet!" the thing said sarcastically.

I squealed. I untangled myself from the person I realized was Edward and walked up to the-

"Stop calling me 'thing' and 'creature!' My name is Lilium." She told me sternly.

"Sorry…" I mumbled in return while looking at the floor, afraid of Lilium.

"Bella, what's wrong?" Edward asked. "What are you sorry for?"

"Can he not see you?" I asked Lilium, suddenly interested in this horrifying cre--drop that thought.

"No, only those who possess the Eyes of the Dead can. And then beyond that there are certain streams of the Eyes. There are 9 streams. You have the 9th. One of every 11 people have the 9th stream and only approximately one in every million have the Eyes of the Dead. So not very many, as you can see." Lilium said.

I had to sit for a second. The fact that I could see people's countdown to death wasn't that I was crazy. There were actually other people who could see them too. The numbers. Forgetting Edward, I stood back up and faced Lilium. I needed to talk to her while I could.

"You don't have a time limit or anything," Lilium said. "I am with you until you die now." She told me. I looked up at her piercing green eyes.

"Seriously?" I asked amazed. "Don't you have a family or anything?" I asked. Lilium shook her head no.

"I am an orphan."

I nodded.

"Bella?" Someone spoke. I turned around and saw that Edward was staring at me incredulously.

"Who are you talking to, Bella?" he asked.

"Um… Nobody. Just to myself…" I told him the quickest lie I could think of. I knew he probably didn't believe me, but I didn't care. Why was he here anyway?

"Lilium, how come he has no numbers?" I asked. When I had turned I was reminded that Edward had no numbers floating above him. "And you too, why don't you have numbers either?" I asked curiously.

"Because I am immortal until _you_ die. Then at that time I will die as well, unless I find another human with the Eyes that doesn't already have a guardian." Lilium answered.

"Oh!" **(2000 words!) **I said.

Lilium knewa lot. I wonder how long she had been alive for, and how many she had guarded.

"For 1,397 years and guarded 14." she said.

"Can you read my thoughts?"

"Yes." Lilium answered.

I nodded again.

_Sweet!_ I said in my mind.

I turned to sit back down on the bed and I was once again was reminded of Edward. He was standing stiff, lips in a tight line, and eyes hard.

"Bella, why are you asking such silly questions?" Edward asked. It sounded like he was trying to lighten himself up because he was unhappy.

"I wasn't talking to you." I replied and sat down.

"Lilium, you didn't answer why he doesn't have any numbers." I said, glancing towards Edward.

"Because he, like me, is immortal."

**HAHAHAHAHA!! I left another cliffy and got exactly 2220 words! It's pretty sweet! REVIEW PEOPLE!!**

**Thank you, to Cudgeled, my beta and to Ninjanoni for the wonderful idea on how to continue this story!**

**I am sorry it wasn't update sooner but my computer crashed like I said at the beginning, so I appreciate your patience. And if you asked questions I wasn't able to answer right away, once again it was because I have no comp. So Thanks again!**


	8. Show then Tell

**A/N Okay everybody. Here is the next chapter. Review. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything at all. : :**

EDWARD'S POV

"Can you read my thoughts?" Bella asked.

I stiffened.

Crap. How did she find out? What was going to happen now?

She wasn't even paying any attention to me. She was looking at the wall. And there was nothing there.

"Bella, why are you asking such silly questions?" I asked unhappily.

I'm sure my eyes went dark the moment that question popped out of her perfect lips…

DON'T GO THERE, I scolded myself.

"I wasn't talking to you." She answered, turning her head to look at me.

What? There was obviously no one else here…

"Lilium, you didn't answer why he doesn't have any numbers…" She asked, looking back at the wall. She must have gotten a surprising answer because she turned around and looked at me with her eyes wide and her mouth slightly open.

"Wow!" she exclaimed. "I wish I were too," she said looking at the wall again.

"I always had an interest in them…" She whispered as if she were out of breath.

"Bella what are you talking about?" I asked.

She turned around and glared at me.

"Nothing of your concern. Liar." she turned around in a huff.

Liar?

What had I lied about? I mean there _was_ the whole vampire thing and then the immortality thing... but other than that… nothing, really.

Then Carlisle walked in.

BELLA'S POV

"Wow!" I exclaimed. "I wish I were too!" I said, looking back at the wall.

"Bella, he is a vampire."

"I always had an interest in them…" I said, whispering.

"Bella, what are you talking about?" he asked.

I turned around and glared at him. _LIAR! LIAR! LIAR!_ was all that went through my head when I looked at him.

"Nothing of your concern. Liar," I sneered at him, turning in an obvious huff.

He lied about being human. About being immortal... he lied about his life. So I guess his family were vampires as well then.

The doorknob turned and Carlisle walked in.

He looked at me staring at the wall, and then looked at Edward, sitting in a chair.

"What's going on in here?" he asked.

"Bella you need to lie back down. Please!"

"You're a liar too!" I exclaimed.

He was the same as Edward. They all were.

"Bella, don't get angry, please!" Lilium pleaded.

"And why not?" I asked angrily.

"Bad things happen with a person with the 9th stream of the Eyes of the Dead." She explained.

"What kinds of things?" I asked.

"Bella, who are you talking to?" asked Carlisle.

I noticed that he was slowly inching closer and closer to me.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" I yelled.

Edward and Carlisle looked taken aback. Shock filled their eyes and Carlisle quickly pulled his hand back to his side.

"Lilium, what kinds of things?"

Lilium looked uncomfortable. She looked down at the ground, then her eyes jumped back up and she started to glare at Edward. She was glaring at Edward. Why?

"Why are you glaring at Edward?" I asked.

"His thoughts, and the doctor's, aren't very pleasant. They are thinking of asylums and how you are talking to air and so I was thinking… maybe you can make them look by me and I will make them see that you are not as insane as you currently seem." she said.

I nodded. I stood up and I could feel their eyes follow my movements carefully. I walked over to Lilium and stood right behind her. From what I knew, they could still see me.

I bent my body to see around Lilium so I could see their faces when she did whatever she was about to do.

Suddenly both their eyes were diverted away from me to in front of me.

"Can they see you?" I asked Lilium.

"Yes. Their thoughts are now going towards 'maybe Bella is not so insane,' or 'we've been hallucinating,' which they know they can't really do."

"Bella, get away from there!" Edward cried suddenly.

"No. Why?" I asked.

"You are standing behind a monster!" he exclaimed.

"Hah!" I screeched.

He jumped, and Carlisle looked stunned.

"Look who's talking! I trust Lilium, she's no monster, you filthy _vampire_!" I sneered.

"H-How do you know that?" Edward asked.

"Don't sound so stunned!" I said.

"Bella, what do you know about our kind?" Carlisle asked slowly.

"What do you know about mine?" I asked.

I was starting to feel tingly. I also felt like the words coming out of my mouth weren't my own. They were somebody else's. The words were more confident than mine ever are, and they weren't the sorts of things that I would say.

"What do you mean Bella, 'your kind?'" Carlisle asked.

"It's not a hard question Carlisle. I mean what do you know about my clan?"

"What are you talking about Bella? Humans don't have clans." Edward said.

"What, after all this you still think that I'm human? You saw Lilium." I said to them.

"Can they still see and hear you?" I asked Lilium. She shook her head.

"Are they any closer to believing anything I say?" I asked.

"A little, they're having a hard time believing it themselves." She replied.

"Oh." I said.

"What's going on here?" a new voice asked.

All of our heads whirled around to see a nurse and Dr. Johansson standing in the doorway.

"All is well, Dr. Johansson," Dr. Cullen said, "All is well."

"And with that, seeing all is well, I am ready to leave, doctor. I feel fine and there is no point in keeping me here as you currently are. My wounds are fine and will be healed in a few days anyway, so there is surely no point in keeping me here any longer."

Dr. Johansson and Dr. Cullen looked at me, stunned. The nurse had left and Edward tried to protest as I gathered my belongings and told them to look away so I could change. I turned my back to them while they were still talking to me trying to change my decision. There was no way they were going to, though.

"It will be all right, won't it Lilium?" I asked.

"It will all be fine… for now that is," she replied.

When I tried to ask her about it she just shook her head and told me to hurry up. Once I was done I pushed past Dr. Johansson and stepped out into the hallway. I walked down a few corridors and left the hospital.

Once outside, I looked at Lilium.

"So you never answered, what happens when I get mad?"

"Well…" she started off.

**A/N okay people I know I haven't been updating as soon as I should but this chapter is about 1100 words and I just want you guys to know how sorry I am to not be updating as frequently my schedule is hectic. Mondays and Thursdays I have volleyball, Tuesdays and Wednesdays I have gymnastics and weekends I have volleyball tournaments and my friends are always over(last one not much of an excuse) but I will try to update the next chapter sooner!!**


	9. Insight

**A/N okay people. I am writing on Word Pad so give extra thanks to my beta Cudgeled for putting**

**up with all my errors. PICTURE OF LILIUM ON PROFILE!! -- what I see Lilium looking like. Mask**

**and all. I GOT MICROSOFT WORD!! YEA!! ( its Microsoft 2007 and really weird! I swear it is so confusing! But whatever as long as I can type hehe)**

BELLA'S POV

"So you never answered, what happens when I get mad?"

"Well..." Lilium started.

"Well...?" I questioned.

"The reason I haven been with you since you were born instead of since you turned 15 is because the last boy who had the ninth stream that I was guarding died."

"And how does this relate?" I asked curiously.

"Well you see I only guard those with the ninth stream of the Eyes of the Dead."

"So?" I asked, prodding her along.

"So... he died because he got so mad that all at once his power exploded inside him, and in a way he kinda blew up." she answered.

I think my mouth dropped a little.

"There was a little girl who I was guarding in… 1837 I believe it was… let me tell you something about the eyes first. You see, the older you are, the less anger it takes to make something happen. So a forty year old getting mad is worse than a 3 year old." Lilium said, "Well, just like your incident, where I have been guarding you since birth, I was doing the same with this little girl," she said. "This little girl died when she was 3 years old because she got _very_ mad. Now, how much anger do you assume this little girl must have had to make that happen? A lot."

I felt so bad.

"So what you're saying is, when you get to mad you die?" I asked to make sure I understood correctly.

"Not necessarily…" she replied, "There was another kid who caused an earthquake so bad that about 600 people died in it. This happened in the town he was living in and it consisted of about 1,500 people."

"Oh!"

Okay. So if I get mad I will blow up and die, or cause an earthquake.

I looked over a Lilium. She shook her head.

"You're not understanding correctly. I'm saying that out of the 14 people I have guarded, two have died because of their power blowing them up, one has caused an earthquake and was the last person who died that day. The cause of his death was that he died in the earthquake, and no one knew he created it. Four have died of natural causes-- old age, sickness, etc-- two were murdered, One drowned, and four committed suicide because they didn't like what they saw and they didn't like having the Eyes of the Dead." She huffed.

"So I could die in countless manners?" I asked

"Yes, yes you have it! Finally!" she answered.

"So that means that you have lived..." I started.

"One thousand three hundred and seven years." she finished.

"Yes, so in 1,397 years you have only guarded 14 people? Or am I number 15? And why couldn't I see you before today if you have been with me since birth?"

"You are number 15 and you couldn't see me before because only I have to guard you. Usually I appear on your 15th birthday but you were fine until you moved here, to Forks. In fact, had you not moved here, you probably wouldn't have known me for another few years."

"Really? How come?" I asked.

"Because you never really got mad. I only showed myself to you because there were vampires around and because after Lily I thought you might be having some troubles. You looked so sad…" she said.

By now we had been walking for probably about 3 hours. We had just wandered around, and when I looked to see where we were, I saw a beautiful park that I had never noticed. We were standing under a huge tree. It was actually kind of pretty…

"So does it happen when somebody feels too much of an emotion at one time?" I asked, she had said I might be having troubles and looked sad.

"Maybe. I don't know. I have only dealt with anger. But it is possible I will ask somebody else when I report back." She said, and then she started mumbling something to herself.

"We should head back to my house… it might be take a little while though…" I answered. "We walked a long way."

"It shouldn't take long to go back. While we walked I should have explained some things to you. Because you have the 9th stream of the Eyes of the Dead you have a few… powers I guess we can call them. You can teleport, as to get yourself away from trouble. That is the main reason you have it, but you can use it whenever you want. You can block out any mental powers to keep your mind safe and you can heal faster than the average human." She told me.

Well that explained a few things, and also why I didn't feel so bad when I woke up from hitting my head. And why I was never hurt very long when I was younger. I am kind of clumsy and when I fall, I usually get hurt. But the pain doesn't _ever_ last long. That might have something to do with that.

"So, how do I teleport?" I asked.

It was getting cold out now. It had to be around 9 p.m.

"Think about where you want to go. Think really hard and only have that one thought on your mind. Chant in your head 'Đây là nơi mà tôi muốn được'" (meaning at bottom of page)

So I did. I chanted 'Đây là nơi mà tôi muốn được' in my head over and over again while thinking about my house, and inside my room. I thought about everything.

"It's okay to open your eyes now, Bella." Lilium told me.

I opened my eyes and believe it or not, I was standing in the middle of my room! That was amazing!

Lilium chuckled. She probably saw this reaction every time.

"Pretty much." she replied to my mental question.

"How can you read my mind if I can block out mental powers? Does that not include mind reading?" I asked, suddenly curious.

"No, I'm just an exception. I have to be able to read your mind to help you, do I not?" she asked.

"Probably…" I answered, "I'm gonna go take a quick shower. Wait here for me." I told her sternly.

"Where do I have to go?" she asked curiously.

I just shrugged my shoulders, grabbed my toiletry bag and pajamas, and trudged to the bathroom. I turned the shower on and stepped into its relaxing heat. It was nice after my stressful day. I washed my hair with my favourite strawberry shampoo, and then washed my body with lavender body wash. It smelled really good. When I was finished I turned off the shower and put on my pyjamas, which consisted of sweat pants and a holy t-shirt. I opened the door and walked back into my room, relaxed.

Lilium was in the exact same spot she was in when I left. I tossed my clothes into the laundry.

"Ahh…" I sighed.

_Time for bed and sleep._

"Goodnight, Lilium." I said, starting to crawl under my covers.

Lilium then suddenly stood up. Then I heard it. A tap. Well, it was more of a thump.

"What was that?" I asked.

"The window." She said.

I looked over.

"I knew I smelt something…" she growled.

I looked at her curiously.

"What?" I asked.

"Vampire." she sneered again.

**A/N Okay guys how do you like?? Review please.**

**Đây là nơi mà tôi muốn được**** means 'This is where I want to be' in Vietnamese**

**It's weird, I know, but I was looking at stuff and it looked cool. So, I know I am weird but bear with me.**


	10. Enemy

**A/N okay peoples…. Here is the next chappie. Thank you to my Beta Cudgeled. **

BELLA'S POV

"WHAT?!"

Vampire? Why were they here? I remember part of our conversation earlier between Lilium and I.

_**Flashback**_

"_Bella, there is another reason I showed myself to you. Vampires are one of the enemies to people with the Eyes of the Dead. Well, actually, not all of them are, but most of them. Especially the Volturi." Lilium started._

"_Volturi?" I asked curiously._

"_They are like vampire royalty. In Volterra, Italy they stay hidden. There are 3 of them. Aro, Caius, and Marcus. They are over 1,000 years old. We currently have a spy there."_

"_How did you get a spy in there? Wouldn't they know that you weren't a vampire?" I asked. _

_Lilium just smiled. _

"Are_ your spies vampires?" I asked, and she nodded._

"_I did some research on the Cullen's __–__the coven residing in Forks__–__ and found out they are close friends with the Volturi." Lilium said._

"_So why are we enemies? What did they do to us?" I asked._

"_We are enemies because we are the one thing that could take over the vampire world. To them, we are a threat. They will torture you for information, and then drain your blood __–__which has been known to improve their powers-- and then kill you." She explained._

_My mouth fell open._

"_Are the Cullen's like that?" I asked hesitantly._

"_I really don__'__t know… like I said, this is part of the reason I showed myself to you."_

_**End of Flashback**_

"Are they gone now?" I asked, looking towards the window.

"What did they want?"

"There was only one. And I am pretty sure it was a male. He was thinking how appetizing your scent is, and yes, he is gone. I think you spooked him when you yelled," she explained.

I nodded and crawled under my covers. I just lay there for a while, with the room silent. Then Lilium started to hum a song, or a lullaby of sorts. It was making me sleepy. I fell asleep quickly, but not before making a mental note to ask her about it tomorrow.

~~~_NEXT MORNING~~~_

I opened my eyes slowly, adjusting to the bright light covering my walls and floor. I looked around and saw Lilium sitting in my mother's old rocking chair in the corner.

"Morning," I said hoarsely.

Lilium smiled.

"Good Morning," she replied.

I smiled back and got out of my warm bed. I grabbed my toiletry bag off my dresser and said a quick "Be right back" and walked over to the next room, the bathroom, and turned on the shower and stepped in. I washed my hair with my favourite strawberry shampoo and washed my body in lavender body wash. I bathed in its warmth for a few minutes before finally stepping out and drying off. Only then did I realize that I had forgotten my clothes in my room.

I opened the door and quickly, not sure if Charlie was still home or not, as it was about 8:15 when I woke up. Today was Saturday, no school. I stepped back into my room, closing the door behind me. Lilium looked up, I noted that her eyes were red, like she had been crying.

"What's wrong, Lilium?" I asked.

"Nothing." She replied, wiping her eyes.

She stood up to shove me towards my closet as a signal to get dressed already. I nodded. I wasn't going to push her into telling me anything. She had been nothing but kind to me, and I in return would respect her.

Once I was in my closet I grabbed a pair of Corduroy pants and a blue turtle neck **(outfit on profile) ** and put them on. When I walked out, for some reason Lilium wasn't there. I looked around worriedly, thinking about vampires and her crying. Then my eye caught something white on the door. A piece of paper… I rushed over to it and tore it off the door.

_Bella,_

_I know I may have worried you by just disappearing like that, but I__'__m not going anywhere far. I will be back in a couple of hours. KEEP OUT OF TROUBLE UNTIL THEN! Do not worry about me and don__'__t come searching, you'll just end up in the way of ,my business. I'll be back soon._

_Lilium. _

My heart rate slowly went back to a normal state as I read the note. Whew! I would have been in panic mode if not for that note.

I walked downstairs to look for some breakfast. It was already around nine, and I was hungry. I opened up the cupboards and found some Pop-Tarts. I wondered how old those were… I had no recollection of having those. Hmm… still… Pop-Tarts… Strawberry flavoured… Tempting! I popped those into the toaster and leaned on the counter. They popped up about a minute later and I grabbed them and sat down at the table.

_Charlie_ I thought suddenly. He must be at work... I didn't know his schedule. Better ask him about it…

Once my Pop-Tarts were gone, I stood up, walked into the living room, and plunked down on the couch to watch TV. I looked through the PVR until I came across the show I was looking for. _Prison Break_. It was amazing! I mean, to think someone could love their brother that much. Whoa! I'm serious. He has guts. And the whole tattoo thing. He's kind of hot too!

I was watching, and curious to what was in the duct-taped black bag. I had no idea. I mean, he kept surprising me. I recorded this episode the other day, and just never had time to watch it. The Teddy guy was just creepy in my opinion. And kind of crazy as well. I liked the old guy, with his poor *sniffle* dead kitty… anyway. I was watching him rip open the bag and put on a… guards outfit?! Whoa… intense… hehe. He climbed up the ladder and popped out of the hole **(no idea what the hole things are called) **and he was just about to walk when the light appeared on him. That made me jump!

He walked into the psych ward… What the hell? Then he got himself inside, and was snooping around looking for another hole. Just as he found it, I heard a sound.

_BAM! BAM! BAM!_

I shrieked. Somebody had just knocked on the door… but who? I wasn't expecting anyone, and Lilium doesn't need to use the door. I paused the show and walked over to the door.

I opened it to my worst nightmare.

**Okay people. REVIEW PLEASE! Tell me any ideas you have for this story. Once again thanks to my beta Cudgeled. *clap clap* Thanks for reading. Any questions? Ask and I will be happy to answer. **

**:***


	11. Phil!

**A/N okay guys. Thanks for all the reviews, and sorry for the wait. I wasn****'****t sure what to write and stuff so. **

**THANKS TO MY BETA CUDGLED AND THANKS TO FERNSFAIRIE FOR THE WONDERFUL IDEAS!**

**WARNINGS**** PLEASE READ!!!!! : THERE ARE GRAPHIC SCENES IN THIS CHAPTER!! I WILL PUT UP WARNINGS BEFORE IT HAPPENS AND THEN A QUICK SUMMARY TO SAY WHAT HAPPENED WHEN IT IS OVER!**

_I opened it to my worst nightmare._

BELLA'S POV

It was Phil.

How did he find me? What did he want? How did he even get out of jail?!

Those were only three of the millions of questions running through my head.

"Hello, _Bella,"_ he sneered.

Crap. I must have looked scared because next he laughed.

"W-What are you doing here Phil?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.

"Here to see you, my dearest Bella."

He smiled. Not a good sign.

"How did you get out of j-jail?" I asked, stuttering slightly.

"Jails aren't as secure as you'd think they are," he answered simply.

I gulped. He broke out, but how did he get here from Phoenix though? Actually I don't think I want to know.

Phil let himself in, pushing me out of the way so he could step inside.

"Nice house," he commented.

I think it was a joke but I was too scared to tell anything at the moment.

He walked into the living room, and knowing better from previous experiences from before he was put in jail, I followed. He turned around, and seeing me behind him, he smiled.

**START OF GRAPHICNESS**

"Bella, my dearest…" he started off. Then he came up to me and put his hand on my breast and squeezed.

"PHIL!" I squeaked, scared and surprised and wanting to run away.

He grinned at my reaction and then proceeded. He put his other hand on my other breast and shoved my back onto the couch. Unfortunately, pushing me meant I was underneath him, which also meant I couldn't get away, and the look in his eyes told me he knew this. I was shaking with fear and I think he misunderstood why I was shaking. He just kept going, kept rubbing my breasts, and then suddenly put his lips on mine. I tried to force him away, but then I realized he had somehow gotten my hands pinned down as well. He tongue moved across my unresponsive lips and tried to force its way in. It finally succeeded and Phil wasn't expecting what I had in store for him now. He tongue, which was currently trying to get a reaction out of mine, was in between my teeth. I bit his tongue, hard. I felt his blood flow into my mouth and he screamed. He held his hand to his mouth, blood pouring out of it.

"You--You BITCH!" he cried.

It took a second to understand what he was saying, and when he spoke, his blood sprayed onto me. I flinched. The smell of blood, nevermind the taste of it, was getting to me. Phil took one hand from his mouth and slapped me across the face. He was still on me, but sitting up right now. I felt a wet mark left on my cheek by his blood. This wasn't helping me any.

He dove back for my face, but I pushed out from under him. He fell backwards, and I ran past him. He screeched and dove for my feet. I don't know why, but I suddenly had some co-ordination. I managed to dodge his hands, and then I ran right for a rock… A rock? A wall maybe, but this was harder. I looked up to see a beautiful face and frightening black eyes. But they weren't looking at me. They were staring at the floor on which Phil was currently sprawled across, blood all around him.

"Good thing I'm vegetarian…" he muttered, trying to lighten the murderous intent I could see in his eyes. "Not that I would drink his disgusting blood anyway." He said only louder.

Phil must have heard him, because his eyes flicked up and they were filled with fear. Good, the bastard deserved to be scared.

"Bella, meet me in the car," Edward ordered, his voice dangerous. I didn't want to defy him, but even without the tone I would have gone, so I ran to the car.

**(END OF GRAPHICNESS) *(Summary. Phil came and in tried to rape Bella. She bit his tongue [should be no guess of how it got into her mouth] he was bleeding everywhere, when Edward showed up. He just told her to meet him in the car)***

EDWARD'S POV

Alice was in the middle of a vision of Bella biting a man's tongue with his hand on her breast when I ran out the door and to my car. I arrived at her house about 3 minutes later… I was driving really damn fast, even for me. Just as I rushed in the door, Bella ran into me. She seemed confused for a moment, and then looked up at my face. My eyes must have been pitch black because I felt her tremble, but then she got over it. Phil, on the other hand, was laying on the floor in his blood and was shaking in fear.

_What is wrong with his eyes? Who is he? Why do I feel so afraid? What is going on here? Why am I, PHIL, scared of this man who stands before me?_

"Good thing I'm vegetarian…" I muttered.

Bella heard me and smiled slightly… it was fake, but a reaction nonetheless.

"Not that I would drink his disgusting blood anyway," I said louder this time for _Phil_ to hear.

Phil was staring at the floor, not able to hold my gaze, but once he heard my comment his eyes flicked up to my face and they were filled with fear.

_Blood? My blood? Why would he want my blood? And DRINK it?… What is with this guy?_

I smirked slightly.

"Bella, meet me in the car," I demanded. She looked up at me for a moment, deciding why to do such a thing. Then she nodded and ran out the door. Once I heard the door open and her get inside and close the door I looked at Phil with an all out evil grin on my face.

_Edward be careful. And take his body away!_ Alice called to me.

I nodded, knowing she wouldn't see it, but she would somehow know I agreed. I walked over to Phil.

**(SMALL AMOUNT OF GRAPHICNESS)**

I picked him up with one hand before looking him in the eyes, not needing his thoughts to know he was terrified. I quickly ripped Phil apart, much like you would a vampire. The first thing I pulled off, though, was his dick. I mean he was a dick enough, he didn't need extra. Then I pulled his arm off and then a leg. Other arm, other leg, and then finally disposing of his head. Seeing as he was human, there was no need to rip him up as much as I would a vampire. I quickly grabbed all the pieces of Phil and ran out the back door. Into the forest. Using my vampire speed I ran a ways in before digging a deep, deep hole. I then chucked the remains in before covering the hole back up. I ran back to Bella's house, through the front door, and opened the door to the drivers side of my beloved Volvo.

"Bella, are you ready to go back to my place?" I asked as I looked over at her.

Her eyes were wide, and she was looking at the living room window. She was shaking and looked dazed. I was confused, and then thought one thing.

_Carlisle_.

**A/N okay people that had some graphicness in it, but in the future there shouldn't be much and I will put up warnings if there is. So REVIEW PEOPLE!!!!!!!!**

**Ideas welcomed. Criticism welcomed/ **

**Lilium will be back next chapter!**


	12. Whose killing who!

**A/N okay my lovely readers…. Thank you for your wonderful support.**

**Thanks you to my beta reader : Cudgeled. **

**Thank you to a helper of ideas : FernsFairie**

**SORRY I UPDATED LATE I HAD A MINOR WRITERS BLOCK!**

**Disclaimer : I don't own anything that is Stephenie Meyer's**

EDWARD POV

_Carlisle._

Carlisle was the only thing on my mind. He could figure out why Bella had looked so terrified and why she was staring at one spot, out the front window… What was wrong with her? I had just told her to go wait in the car. She hadn't seen anything. She couldn't have. We were speeding toward my house when Bella started to stir in her seat. Then she started to shake. What the hell?!

All I could hope was that Alice had a vision and was getting Carlisle prepared.

ALICE POV

After my vision Edward just ran off to his car and sped away. I mean, I expected it and all, but I didn't want him to do anything stupid. That wouldn't help anybody.

Another vision showed Edward tearing Phil into pieces.

_Edward be careful. And take his body away! _ I thought as soon as I saw it. I was pretty sure he had agreed to take it away… he probably would have anyway. Edward is a good person… vampire.

Then, another vision came.

_Edward was speeding down the road toward our house. He looked over at Bella, who had a distant look in her eye. Almost like the one I have when I have a vision. She was shaking, and then she went still, her heart beating rapidly. I could hear it through Edward's ears. Then she let out a small scream, and her eyes filled with fear and pain._

"CARLISLE," I yelled knowing fully that I had no need to. He appeared in front of me seconds later.

"Alice?" he asked.

"Edward is bringing Bella… But something's wrong with her Carlisle, something is wrong..."

EDWARD POV

I was pushing my car to its' limits trying to get home. Bella's shaking had increased, and her body was practically vibrating. I would have thought she was having a seizure if not for the fact that there were no symptoms other than the shaking. Then, suddenly, she stopped. I could feel the seat stop moving, and for a second I worried, but when I listened I noticed her heart beat. It was still going, a little too fast, but not within unreasonable limits considering the circumstances.

I looked back at the road, and just as I did, Bella let out a shrill scream. It filled the air and my head snapped back to look at her. Her face had paled far past what was considered humanly normal. Her breathing was becoming shallow. I looked back at the road and noticed that I had subconsciously turned up our drive way and our house was becoming awfully close. I stepped down on the brake and we quickly stopped, my hand in front of Bella to keep her from launching forwards.

I got out of the car and ran around to her side, ripping open the door. Thankfully, it was still on its hinges. I gripped Bella's waist and ran into the house.

"New record, Edward! 3 minutes and 43 seconds." Emmett commented, obviously trying to lighten the mood. I snarled and raced up to the room beside mine where I had heard Carlisle call to me.

He had some equipment set up and the bed was made with comfy looking blankets. Esme was here helping, one could tell just by looking at the warm atmosphere of the room. I carefully laid Bella down. She whimpered and I put my hand on hers. Suddenly Lilium appeared.

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?" she roared. I winced.

_She can be quite loud when she wants to be, _Carlisle thought

I nodded in silent agreement.

"Well, Phil came to Charlie's house and tried to ra...rape her," I stuttered.

Carlisle came over and put a hand on my shoulder. I smiled.

_It's okay. Just keep talking, _Carlisle assured me.

"I raced in before he could though, because Alice had a vision. I told Bella to go to the car and wait for me. I ripped Phil apart and ran into the forest and buried him about 20 feet below the ground. When I came back to the car, Bella was shaking. So I brought her here. And here we are," I said, my voice still wavering. I wasn't looking at Lilium, afraid to see her face. Bella was like a daughter to her, And mothers and daughters usually had a close bond.

When I finally looked up, I saw Lilium's face. It was worse then I thought. Her face was twisted in a mixture of disgust and anger. Her face, instead of its pale white colour, was a bright red. She looked like she was ready to kill someone.

"THAT BASTARD," she screamed. Following her scream, Bella started to shake again. It was almost like she was shivering this time.

Lilium yelped. Her face paled back to its normal colour.

"Lilium, what's wrong?" I asked.

"I can read Bella's mind, remember?" She whispered.

And with that, pictures flowed into my mind. I could read Lilium's mind right now, and what I saw horrified me. There were images flowing second-hand to me of everything that had happened.

_I had forgotten about the living room window._ **(was gonna stop it there but I knew that was mean and its too short! Hehe your all lucky **: )** )**

Bella had been watching through the living room window. She had seen everything. She had seen me rip Phil apart, she had seen blood splatter mercilessly across the window, and she had seen me. She had seen my eyes, and I looked vicious. No wonder she was the way she was at the moment.

Lilium turned around and glared at me. She glared hard. If her glare could turn a vampire to dust, I would be the dust of the dust. Seriously.

"I am going kill you," she whispered menacingly, looking at me.

Carlisle stepped in front of me, taking action at once.

"We are not killing anybody. Edward loves Bella very much and wouldn't ever purposely let her see something that horrific." Carlisle defended.

Lilium snarled, and with that, she launched herself at me, and Carlisle flew in the way.

**A/N okay people please review and keep your eyes open for a new story coming out by me and FernsFairie. I don't have a title yet we haven't thought of one but the first chappie should be out soon.**


	13. Help?

**Okay people thank you for reading so far. I appreciate the reviews. **

**Thanks you to my beta reader : Cudgeled. **

**Thank you to a helper of ideas : FernsFairie**

EDWARD'S POV

Carlisle flew out in front of me, standing between me and Lillium. She snarled and picked Carlisle up, launching him into the wall… which he flew right through. She then turned to me and grabbed my shoulders.

"Bastard," she hissed and started to rake her nails from my shoulder down my arm. Her nails hurt like a BEEP. Not kidding. She kept raking at me. I think her plan was to slowly rip me apart. Scratch me to death. That didn't sound right. Or possible.

"Lil...ee...um," her voice strained.

Bella! She was awake.

Lilium let go of me and flashed over to Bella's side.

"Bella," she whispered kindly, not a hint of the evil aura from before noticeably remaining.

Bella mumbled something.I, being a vampire, couldn't even hear her. Lilium must be reading her mind.

LILIUM'S POV

"Bella," I whispered kindly

My anger was gone. Bella was awake now. I would help her for now, and deal with them later.

"S-scar-scary," she mumbled, her eyes closed.

In her mind I saw Edward tearing Phil apart and the blood splashing across the window. The memory played through her mind over and over again. She fell back asleep and I kissed her forehead like a mother would. I had protected and been a guardian of many, but Bella, for some reason unknown, I felt most protective over.

"I need to think," I began, "I'll be back though. Hurt her and you're worse than dead," I glared hard at all of them, not sure as to where I was going. I then jumped out the open window in the room.

EDWARD'S POV

Lillium leapt out the window, and I stood there stunned. She had said worse than dead. Technically we were already dead but I didn't doubt Lilium's words, so I had just nodded. I mean, my arm was scratched up. It hurt too. I wonder how long it would take to fully heal, because for some reason it wasn't healing very fast right now.

Carlisle gracefully landed back in the house, a slight grin on his face. I think he was happy to see I wasn't hurt too bad and that Lilium was gone. He walked over to Bella after giving me a nod.

_Lilium said she saw what happened between you and Phil. That means her problem is psychological. We have no way of seeing inside her head because Edward can't read it... _Carlisle continued his mental rant. I tuned him out as to the fact that I didn't care much to hear him repeat and try and get to a conclusion. I'd listened to him and his medical rants before and I swear I almost fell asleep. AND I'M A VAMPIRE!

I walked over beside Carlisle and placed my hand on top of Bella's still one. I hated to see her in this condition. She almost looked dead. Her eyes fluttered underneath her eyelids and then she began to squirm.

I started to rub small circles in her hand and the movement stopped. I gave a small smile. I was happy I could assist this lovely… wait. I was happy I could assist her and her beauty…. DAMN IT EDWARD SHUT IT!! I screamed at myself.

BELLA'S POV

I opened my eyes in slits and looked. I could see nothing but a white ceiling.

"Lil...ee...um," I strained to say.

Where did Lilium go? Why was my voice so horrible? What happened?

That's when I felt a presence beside me. I smiled a little and it all flooded back to me. Edward attacking Phil after he told me to get out of the house. I had gotten into the vehicle and looked at the door waiting for Edward to come through it when a movement caught my eye. I turned my head and saw the living room. Edward looked **mad.** No, not mad, but absolutely livid. He had an uncontrolled rage burning in his incredibly black eyes. With that he was on Phil in moments. I saw a limb fly somewhere before seeing blood splatter the window I was looking in.

"S-scar-scary," I mumbled frightened.

I muffled a scream as a hand touched mine. I squirmed under the touch imagining blood smearing my hand. When someone's thumb started rubbing my hand in circles, the fright went away to be replaced by something I couldn't name.

_-Bella honey- _

_-Bella. Let me show you how to kiss-_

_-Bella. YES BELLA YES!-_

EDWARD'S POV

Bella let out a very loud screech. It hurt my sensitive ears and she started to tremble. I think she was remembering. Where was Lilium?

Bella stopped trembling and sat up straight as a board and looked at me holding her hand. I think she smiled at that a little bit.

"Bella are you alright? How do you feel? Are you dizzy?" Carlisle started to question.

"Fine. Fine. No," She said before leaping up.

"LILIUM!" She screamed.

I covered my ears.

BELLA'S POV

I screamed Lilium's name wanting her in here now. I had a question.

A moment later Lilium appeared, looking slightly annoyed.

"What?" she asked.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU HELP ME?" I screamed.

LILIUM'S POV

"What do you mean?" I asked softer this time.

"You said you were with me since I was a baby right?" she asked

"Yes."

"Why didn't you help me, then?" she repeated quietly on the verge of tears.

"I'm still confused," I stated. That's when I remembered I could read her mind. I looked at it and saw angry flashes of Bella. Bella and Phil. Phil and Bella.

_-Bella! OH MY GOD! YES!!-_

_-Bella this is the last step. two people take-_

The thoughts continued like this. She was talking about Phil and why I hadn't stopped that.

"I- I honestly don't know," I mumbled.

Why hadn't I shown myself? What was I afraid of? I wasn't afraid of anything. But I wasn't even supposed to be there at those times. Still. Why hadn't I stopped any of it? Was I afraid I would be punished for exposing myself early? But I could have had Phil hurt in a human accident. I could have had him die somehow without making it obvious. Why hadn't I stopped him from hurting Bella? I had known it was wrong. I had known it was bad. I had known it was horrible. I had known … I had known…. I had known and I had done not a flipping thing to fix or help Bella get away from it. WHY?!?!

I heard a sob. But whether it was from me or Bella I did not know. People said that Humans aren't perfect. Does that mean everything else is? We all made mistakes. Why couldn't I be forgiven for this inexcusable sin?

**A/N okay readers. Sorry for taking so long. I had a bit of another writers block and I was busy all last weekend and last week never mind so far this week. Review please. Thank you everyone for your continuous reviews. They mean a lot to me**


	14. Two Face

**A/N sorry for taking so long to update people!! I AM SO SORRY! I have had a lot going on since I last updated. There was the holidays *happy belated Christmas and New Year* and then we were supposed to be moving so I had my book that had this chapter in it packed and then I found out we weren't moving so I had to figure out which box this was in and some other stuff… So here it is.**

**Thank you to my Beta reader! Cudgeled.**

**Disclaimer. I don't own anything Stephenie Meyer does.**

**BELLAS POV**

I sobbed and tears streamed like waterfalls down my face. A cold hand pulled me into a cold, cloth covered chest.

"Ssh, Bella, Ssh" A voice soothed. Right now nothing made sense. It was kinda like when you started to mix different paint colours together. But not completely blend them. You would be able to see swirls of colours all mixed up and confused as to what to do.

My tears soaked the grey shirt, in which I gripped dearly and evil thoughts of Phil were in a constant memory stream. His face. His evil doings. It was ravaging my mind like a plague.

When I finally stopped crying I looked up to see who was holding me so gently. Immediately I was transfixed with his liquid golden eyes. I gasped

"I'm sorry!" and quickly pulled myself out of his beautiful arms wiping my face with my sleeves. I looked down and saw his shirt was soaked.

"OH! I'm SO SO Sorry!" I yelped. " I will get you a new one I promise" I teared up again.

"It's fine. No need I have plenty more shirts. Believe me!" he assured – though he didn't have me convinced. He looked kind of confused at my behaviour as well. I was talking to him like I didn't know who he was, and even though it feels like I should know him I don't remember him

"Edward!" I cried, burying my head into his shoulder once again. His face relaxed visibly and I felt his body loosen,

"Ssh, Bella. I'm so sorry about this!" Edward whispered.

"About what?" I asked. I was the one who was staining his shirt over pointless tears.

"About what you saw because of my carelessness" Edward added, cleaning up my confusion.

"Phil" I stated grimly. If not for Edwards Vampire hearing I don't know if he would have heard the strain in my voice to say his name.

"Yes" he breathed.  
"It's okay" I comforted. "I was just to weak to stop him before" I sobbed.

"Bella, your anything but weak." He countered my words instantly.

Finally my eyes were out of tears to produce and I was just sitting there latched onto Edward's shirt.

Just as I let go of Edward and thanked him Lilium popped back through the window.

"Bella!" she cried. She ran over and hugged me mumbling I'm sorrys over and over again. I pulled her off me never having seen her looking so vulnerable.

"I'm okay now" I told her. She shook her head.

"No your not" she signed. Edward and I looked at her questionably.

"What?" I asked. What I didn't realize is it wasn't Lilium who said that. Carlisle walked out from behind Lilium who was to caught up in all the emotion to sense him to start with.

"I mean that your not okay" Carlisle restated.

"What do you mean I'm not?" I asked. My voice panicky.

"You have been traumatized mentally, and as result went a little… strange for a bit. You shook and cried and fell unconscious. You forgot who Edward was for a few minutes as well. You have been abused. This is what leads me to this conclusion" Carlisle said. **(A/N I have no idea if any of these hold true) **"These are all factors in emotional and mental instability."

"So I'm crazy" I asked starting to hyperventilate. Thoughts of strait jackets and white rooms and doctors and needles and asylums popped into my head.

"No. Your mentally unstable"

Edward stepped forwards ready to lash out at Carlisle for his words but Lilium beat him to it.

She punched Carlisle, which happened to make a new hole in the wall. Esme was going to be angry.

**EDWARDS POV**

Bella watched Carlisle go through the wall. I grabbed her and held her in a hug. It was then I felt her start to shake.  
"It's okay Bella" I said trying to calm her. Her shoulders shook harder. I looked down expecting to see tears racing down her cheeks. What I saw instead surprised me.

Bella looked to be laughing. She was laughing. It was as if nothing was happening right now. Nothing had happened.

'_Edward, son, back away for a moment. Go slow. Put Bella down and back away from her' _Carlisle thought to me. I looked up to see Carlisle was back in the room and he and Lilium were just staring at Bella. I looked back at her.

"Bella sweetie." I said hoping to catch her attention. Shoe looked at me before laughing even harder.

Her laughing stopped. She sat motionless for a moment. Then her laugh came back, but now it wasn't a normal laugh. No now it was a maniacal laugh. Bella's eyes were crazed and her laugh was scaring me. It made me scared for Bella and what had happened to her. I looked at Lilium zeroing on her mind. Hoping to get a glance at Bella's

But do you even think that what I found in her mind seemed remotely sane?

"Lilium are those your thoughts?" I asked a little more frightened. Curiosity killed the cat. That saying kept running through my mind. I was beyond scared as the thoughts continued. What if those thoughts were Bella's?

Lilium looked at me gravely and shook her head no. I growled. She was lying she had to be!

"Bella" she said solemnly.

I felt as though if I had a heart it would have frozen in shock. Thawed out and frozen again, then blow up. I felt like I could have a vampire's version of hyperventilation.

"Bella's thoughts?" I squeaked. She nodded.

"Bella was thinking those things?" I asked again trying to prove her wrong.

She nodded again.

"What is wrong with her?" I asked. Before Lilium could answer Carlisle asked,

"What was she thinking?" I looked at him.

"Death, blood, us dead with our heads sitting on our chest, our hands holding them there. Peoples hearts all over the place, along with other organs. She was thinking about rooms painted with blood. She was thinking about ways to kill, ways to torture." I sobbed. I couldn't think like this.

Bella's laughing rose back into the room.

"Death to the undead is fitting. Don't you think?" she asked. Laughing.

Bella, what happened to you?

**A/N okay people. Let me know what you think. ******** hope you liked it. Sorry again for making you wait so long!!!! **

**R&R**


	15. Insanity comes with problems

**A/n Okay people life is busy so here is my update and hopefully it will be okay ******** Sorry about always taking so long to update. **

**Thank you to my Beta Cudgeled.**

EDWARD'S POV

_Bella, what happened to you?_

I couldn't concentrate on anything.

_Bel--_

No, the thoughts were running in my mind on playback. The blood on the walls. The hearts all over the place. Everything in Bella's mind. Everything that shouldn't be there. Why was it there? What happened to Bella? Carlisle and I had both been to med school and neither of us knew what was going on. I had worked in the Psych ward for a while and never had I seen anything like this. Sure, some people had crazy thoughts and some people seemed crazy, but it was never like this.

_Edward, we will figure this out. I promise, _I heard Carlisle send my way.

LILIUM'S POV

I blocked my thoughts off so that stupid vamp couldn't read my thoughts. So stupid, I swear! All I had to do was implant the undetectable device in her brain and click the button and this was the result. The device I had just invented recently over the years of 'guarding' Bella. I had been bored. Truth is I had seen what was happening to her and I had laughed at her while Phil stole her innocence little by little.

Honestly, that girl is so trusting. I just have 6 more after I get rid of her and then I will have the ultimate power of the Shinigami. (death god)

CARLISLE'S POV

I had never seen anyone so… so… unstable before. Sure there were the ones that seemed crazy, but they weren't this bad. Bella's change in mind was so sudden! It usually takes years for insanity to manifest, not minutes. Something is wrong with this situation, and for Edward I will figure it out.

BELLA'S POV

****WARNING: Graphic thought coming up. Don****'****t read if you don****'****t like gore and graphic killings. (its not that bad. I just cant write graphicness very well.)****

I looked at the young boy. The things that could be done with such a beautiful head. I could start by cutting the skin off his pretty face. All that pretty, red blood running down from the open wounds. I could slice up his chest and lick up the blood…. Or I could start by… Oh I know I could chop him up. First the end joints on his fingers, and then work my way up little… by… little. Little by little.

Finish that arm. All the blood spilling on the floor. Devouring it.

Start on the next arm. Finish with that arm and move onto the legs, slowly slice those up and then after that…

Start chopping up the chest. From the bottom up, and then finally, finish with his head.

And then, by some miracle, he is still alive with all his immortality, I will slowly burn the pieces of his body. Oh my… I could skin him and rip out his organs… Sort of what you do to an animal… ooh… so scrumptious...

****Graphics over. Bella just imagined ways to kill Edward. : )****

EDWARD'S POV

Bella is so unstable! I went behind her even with her growling at me. I knocked her on the back of the head wanting to knock her out. What was wrong?

CARLISLE'S POV

_Edward. We should go to the hospital to take an MRI._

He nodded to show understanding.

"Are you sure that will be a good idea?" Lilium asked.

"Yes. To see what is wrong and where exactly whatever it is that is wrong, we need to scan her brain. Don't worry. It won't harm her."

Edward and I looked at her curiously when she had a small snarl on her face, but it came as quick as it went. For some reason I was getting more and more uneasy regarding Lilium as time went on… why was that, I wondered? She was guarding Bella. Or is it something more?

"Carlisle!" Edward called me out of my thoughts.

I nodded, and he picked her up and took her to the car.

We drove there in silence. Lilium sat in the back with Bella, lightly stroking Bella's brown hair.

When we got there, I signed Bella in and filled out her charts. Edward sat with her in her room and Lilium left, saying she couldn't stand to be here when Bella was like this.

"Edward, the MRI is clear now, so let's get her in before another patient comes in." I said.

We took her in, placed her on the stretcher, and slid her inside. Edward followed me into the computer room to examine the upcoming image. Just as we sat down to start, Bella started to thrash around and scream… in pain?

The MRI shouldn't hurt her. There was nothing magnetic in her. What was going on? The picture I had taken was blurry. I left to go get Bella out. The moment I took her out, she calmed down

"What the hell was that?" she asked… her normal self I think.

"Um… you were going through an MRI, but you started screaming." I said.

"Why did it hurt my head so much?" Bella asked.

"Bella, I don't know the answer to that but I will find out. I promise."

"Carlisle!" Edward called from the examination room.

I quickly went to his side.

"What is that?" he asked pointing out a big mass in Bella's blurry MRI. It was large and black, similar to a tumour. But it doesn't make sense. There would have been symptoms before this. This is so confusing. It makes no sense. Edward nodded, reading my thoughts.

There seemed to be slight deterioration in the brain, but I dismissed it. Must be caused by the mutation. What did Bella have? This wasn't simply insanity anymore. This was something more.

**A/N okay peoples. I know I haven****'****t been updating really but life is hectic… I keep having major writers blocks for this. So this story should wind up in a bit… thanks sorry for the news.**


	16. Hospital Mayhem

**Okay so I realize I haven't update in a long, long time. But I was reading my story and was like I should update this again. I have no guarantees that I will keep on going and finish the story though.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or anything to do with it.**

Previously 

_"What the hell was that?" she asked… her normal self I think._

_"Um… you were going through an MRI, but you started screaming." I said._

_"Why did it hurt my head so much?" Bella asked._

_"Bella, I don't know the answer to that but I will find out. I promise."_

_"Carlisle!" Edward called from the examination room._

_I quickly went to his side._

_"What is that?" he asked pointing out a big mass in Bella's blurry MRI. It was large and black, similar to a tumour. But it doesn't make sense. There would have been symptoms before this. This is so confusing. It makes no sense. Edward nodded, reading my thoughts._

_There seemed to be slight deterioration in the brain, but I dismissed it. Must be caused by the mutation. What did Bella have? This wasn't simply insanity anymore. This was something more._

And Now

Edwards POV

We took Bella out of the MRI room and into the room Carlisle had set up for her. Lilium had stopped disappearing from us when she was around and floated soundlessly behind us with a look of concentration on her face.

What was she thinking about?

Why did she have such a nasty look before, what pushed her to become such a sullen creature. She seemed kinda like a fake. The more I think about it her smiles seem more fake than real and her actions of happiness seem a bit forced. She can hide it but if your really looking its there.

Normal POV

Lilium growled looking pointedly in Edwards direction not liking how his thoughts were moving. She couldn't be found out here. She refused.

As everyone kept walking Edward continually thought more and more about Lilium. What they knew about her and what they didn't. How she just appeared randomly and her actions and personality.

Bella walked numbly ahead trying to process how everything was coming together. Why hadn't Lilium saved her?

Bella POV

I kept trying to think of why she couldn't save me. She said that she was afraid of the higher up's power of showing herself to early. But she could have done something couldn't she.

"Bella" Carlisle called.

"Yes?" I answered.

"Bella, we need to keep you here at the hospital for observation. If you don't mind that is"

"I thought you couldn't see anything in the MRI" I questioned.

"Bella… When we got the picture, it was blurry but there was a mass, in your brain. It seemed to be a tumour of sorts. And it seems that your brain was deteriorating" Carlisle said softly. I don't think he wanted to sound scary, But it didn't matter. I am scared now. I have a tumour and my brain is deteriorating. Is this what happens when you get mad. Is this what happened because I got mad.

I felt a hand on my shoulder just as we were turning into a room and saw Lilium. She smiled sadly, then removed her arm.

So it was. I am dying because I got too angry. I wonder how long I will be left with.

"Bella I know it's a lot to take in. But remember we will do all we can to help you." Edward said soothingly. Why would Edward say that to me? It's like he really cares or something.

But he is quite attractive, and his whole self is extremely enthralling. There have been a few times that I have caught myself looking at him for too long. But he's a vampire.

And I'm human. Kind of.

"Bella you need to lie down and rest. We will come back and check on you in a few hours. Try and get some sleep, it's almost 2 in the morning."

"Okay. Carlisle I have a question."

Carlisle stopped walking out and turned towards me.

"Did Lily make it?" His faced went from tense and calm to a depressed smile.

"No, Bella. Lily died on the table. I'm sorry" He finished, and turned around and walked out.

I just sat there. I felt a wet substance dripping down my face leaving cold trails on my cheeks.

I was crying. Lily. She was only 8 and I could do nothing to make it so she could live her life. I couldn't stop her death. Why? Why would you take an 8 year old little girl? What did she ever do?

At one point I felt someone hug me tight. The cool skin instantly jerking me from my state.

_-Bella, Bella, Bella.-_

"Bella!" I snapped my head up.

"What?" I asked shaking slightly.

"You weren't responding. I thought something was wrong"

"No. no. I'm fine. I was just thinking" I'm not really alright. But who were they to need to know that.

Edwards POV

She looked at me in the eye and I knew she was lying. But I couldn't help that. I couldn't help her. Why did that make me so depressed, I wanted to help Bella so bad. I wanted to know everything about her.

I wanted to touch her, and hold her and be near he, and… oh my god., I'm in love with her. I love Bella and that's why I keep coming to help her. It's why I'm so worried about her all the time

I'm in love with Bella Swan.

Lilium POV

Now that the seed has been planted in the minds of them all that she is insane, if they ship her off to a mental asylum it would make my job only that much easier. But unfortunately they found the scaring in her brain from when I implanted it. If they operate they will find my device. Unless I take it out first.

But then my control is gone. But I could kill her another way. This way is just more enjoyable. Hmm… what to do what to do?

**Okay. I realize that I have not written in a long long time but please bear with me until I can figure out how to do so again. I apologize for this chapter's length but depending on the feedback will determine whether I update again or not.**


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